Oh, The Glamourous Life!

Dear Constant Reader,

Happy Friday! Holiday season is fast approaching and you don’t need me to remind you to buy from local businesses and independent artists. However, here’s your tip:

Shop early this year.

Whether you are buying gifts for others or treats for yourself, plan ahead and start early. The post office and other delivery services are going to be very busy this year. Let’s not stress ourselves, the shops, or our gift recipients with trying to get things shipped at the last minute.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 12 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Dear Constant Reader,

I have a biography of Lili St. Cyr in my to-be-reviewed pile, but I realized I had never reviewed this earlier look at the legendary stripteause.

Gilded Lili: Lili St. Cyr and the Striptease Mystique by Kelly DiNardo, 2007.

Lili St. Cyr was known for her elegant, elaborate stage shows and her cool, remote beauty, as well as her lavish lifestyle and many affairs, but she remains something of an enigma. Ms. DiNardo wants to reveal the genuine Lili St. Cyr. Besides utilizing numerous print resources, she conducted interviews with some people who still remembered the dazzling dancer. 

We look at the life of Lili St. Cyr, from her early family life and her escape though a teenaged marriage, through arc of her career and fame, to her death in self-imposed exile. Her story is interwoven with a look at the prevailing culture throughout her life. Sometimes she rebelled against the culture norms; sometimes they shaped her. We are shown the people and circumstances that influenced her, like Greta Garbo and travel by ocean liner. Also, those she influenced — there’s a section about Marilyn Monroe using Lili as a role model for her bombshell persona, which devolves into how one of Lili’s husbands tried to capitalize on his relationship with both women with some tawdry (and mostly likely utterly fictitious) revelations.  

Occasionally the book feels padded, such as a mention that the teenaged Marie van Schaak (Lili’s birth name) liked to read Vogue digresses into a paragraph about the fashion magazine, or stretched, like when the author interviewed an ex-husband’s landlord for details on his life long post-Lili.

Despite all the detail and facts, I didn’t feel like I really got to know who Lili St. Cyr was. She is the center of the book and yet I felt like we were only able to stand on the fringes of her life, at a safe distance. Many of the people Ms. DiNardo interviewed knew Lili at a remove, like the children of club owners. One of her husbands was probably the closest person to her that spoke with the author, but even he doesn’t seem to have known Lili’s inner life very well. Despite baring her body night after night onstage, she kept her soul very well concealed.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 12 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Dear Constant Reader,

I have  a complicated relationship with writing. It’s my main form of communication, but I don’t think I’m a good writer. Writing is a slow and painstaking process for me and I’m never confident in the result. It can take me weeks to write one book review here. I agonize over word choice and sentence structure. And I’m always a little embarrassed to hit “Publish”.

So it surprises the hell out of me when people praise my writing. I received a number of compliments on my most recent post, specifically on the beautiful writing. I’m not used to that.

I think my adversarial relationship with writing began in 6th grade at an awful school with a terrible English teacher. I decided I hated writing and my skills deteriorated. Oh the irony — I was in a gifted program and remedial writing classes. I was so miserable there that my parents decided to send me to private school, which made a lot of things better, but writing was still a struggle

Through college and grad school and a certificate program, I brute forced my way though essays and papers and theses. Over the years I’ve been told my writing was stilted, too formal, awkward, not natural.

Through out the years, however, I’ve kept a paper journal and an electronic one (remember LiveJournal?) and a pen-and-paper correspondence with a dear friend (I probably owe you a letter!) and of course, this blog, which is over ten years old! (How did I miss that anniversary…?). I’ve found a sort of pleasure in writing, but it still doesn’t come easily. I still can’t believe I put out two books.

So, I’m not used to getting compliments on my writing. But I appreciate it so much. Thank you for your kind words.

P.S. Just for the record, it took me three days to put together this little missive.

Dear Constant Reader,

(no Friday Tip this week. I think this will explain why)

I’ve always believed cats are a gift from the Universe. When you need a cat, one comes into your life. However, the Universe can also take cats away…

Nine years ago, Albert A. Cat wandered into our life. If you’ve been reading my missives that long you know how Scratch, not a cat person, found him on the street and they immediately knew they needed each other. He is a delight and the center of our little world. 

Three years ago Albert started having seizures, which terrified us. Fortunately, with medication, he is perfectly fine. However, we keep a close eye on his health and he sees a couple of specialist vets. 

Recently we discovered his thyroid levels were slightly elevated and we had a couple of options to treat it. There was really no question that we were going to go for radiation therapy.  It would cure him, instead of just treating the issue with diet or medication for the rest of his life. There were just two drawbacks — it’s very expensive and he would be in the hospital for two weeks without any visits allowed. In all his time with us, he’s never been away from both of us for more than four days.

But we did it. The staff at Angell Animal Medical Center are great. We got daily reports on his progress and photos. Scratch started a GoFundMe and so many people, including a bunch we didn’t even know, contributed to Albert’s medical bills. We were counting down the days until he could come home. (Albert is fine. I’m explaining to you because you look nervous.)

But Albert is not the only cat in our lives. There are several feral cats in our neighborhood and two decided to make our yard home. They were inseparable and would constantly be headbutting one another in a most adorable fashion. We named the black and white one Tux and the big orange one Ginger Tom. Collectively we call them The Boys. Tux was wary, but Tom was sweet and trusting. Scratch built them a deluxe shelter (with heat in the winter) and fed them every day. He would call and they’d come running. It was one of my great joys to peek out the window and see what The Boys were doing — napping in the sun, grooming each other, hiding amid the plants in my garden. To be honest, Tom’s my favorite of the two.

Last Thursday I fed them in the evening as usual. Friday morning only Tux came. He just sat and looked and waited. Tom is the more adventurous of the two and would often be off doing “Tom things”, but I was worried. Tux didn’t usually act like that.

But it was Expo weekend and off we went to Salem.

We got back on Monday, excited to pick up Albert the next day. But still no Tom.

After asking our other cat-feeding neighbors, we found out that Tom was killed sometime in the middle of Thursday night, probably by a coyote. I like to think he was defending Tux.

Albert’s homecoming was filled with tears. And because of the radiation, we have to limit our contact with him for the next few days. Of course all we want to do is hold him close and never let go.

We share a back fence with The Rectory for our local Episcopalian church and The Boys frequented their yard as well. It was the Father and his wife who found Tom. 

Yesterday, in the rain, we had a funeral. The Father’s wife and the Sister who also lives there and Scratch dug a grave in their garden and we laid a cairn of stones over him. It’s a beautiful, peaceful spot and there’s a bush of rosemary right next to him. Sister gave me a bunch and it’s in a vase next to me as I write. Rosemary is for remembrance.

It’s hard to feel so helpless. I know there was nothing I could have done to save Tom’s life, but it hurts so much. I know feral cats have hard and short lives, but it’s not fair. We will continue to care for Tux and hopefully he’ll know our yard is a safe place. He sits and waits for Tom and it just breaks my heart. I hurt so much.

Scratch said it better than I can: “Tom was sweet, fearless, and dumb. And he trusted me and loved Tux with a fierceness that was a joy to see.” I will miss him more that I can say.

All I can do is love Albert and try to comfort Scratch, as he tries to comfort me.

Dear Constant Reader,

It’s Friday! Time for a tip!

Along with my Little Book of Burlesque Costuming, I provide a bookmark which has a list of essential sewing tools and I want to highlight one in particular. I just list “ruler” as one of those essential tools, but today’s tip is about a specific kind of ruler.

Get a clear ruler.

I originally bought mine to use as a straight-edge with my rotary cutter. Then I realized all the other things it could do, like take the effort out of marking long, accurate lines. It’s invaluable for pattern making and hemming.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 14 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Dear Constant Reader,

It’s Friday again! Here’s a tip!

Check out rhinestone brands other than Swarovski.

I know there’s a lot of prestige in the Swarovski name, but the company has decided to get out of the “DIY market” and concentrate on their luxury lines. By the end of the year they will stop selling to retailers who will stop selling to us. (You may weep briefly.)

Do not despair! There are a lot of other great stones out there that might fit your needs and budget better. Get some sample cards, play around with colors, expand your horizons. Be prepared for when all the Swarovskis are gone.

Manuge et Toi has done some great work researching rhinestone brands. Support her on Patreon to see her rhinestone comparison video.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 14 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Dear Constant Reader,

Last night marked one year since the BeauTease appeared on stage in front of an audience. We were in Taste O’ Burlesque at Thunder Road, bookending the competition. If you want to see the show, much of it is here. We were starting to worry about the approaching epidemic. I had made Guilted Lilly a basket to take on her woodland frolics and when she went to hug me, for a moment, I thought “should I do this?”. I’m so glad I accepted her bountiful embrace, because it was the last time I would touch someone who wasn’t living in my house for many months.

Since then Thunder Road has closed for good and we’ve done five virtual shows (I’ll write about that experience another time). I miss performing live. I miss it so much. I keep thinking about being backstage, getting ready for a show. Chatting with the other troupe members, checking in with the stage hands. Everyone knows what to do — we hang the banners, put together the clothing racks and unpack the costumes, set out snacks (most often Devastasia). It’s fun. It’s hard to imagine that we didn’t have to wear masks and keep our distance.

The best part is being in front of the audience. Something changes when there are people there. A lot of performers talk about the energy of the audience and it’s true. There’s a connection and you each feed off each other’s excitement. Having people to play off, even if it’s just tossing a smile over here or directing a bump over there, makes such a huge difference in performance. Sure, I give my best to the camera (or try to), but I don’t feel as playful or spontaneous as when I’m in front of people. There’s a reason we say “the magic of live theatre”.

I can’t believe it’s been a year. I miss you all.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 14 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.