Oh, The Glamourous Life!

Dear Constant Reader,

It’s Friday! Today is also the penultimate performance of Vamps After Midnite! We’ve been having so much fun with this show and last night we had a special guest in the audience — Devora Darling! It was so good to see her in person.

Here’s your tip!

Know exactly where your props are at the top of the show.

Is this tip inspired by an actual incident? Maybe…

Before the show starts, check over your props and know where they are. If someone else is bringing them on for you, make sure you both know how and where that transfer will happen (do you hand them over before you go on stage? are they on a prop table back stage? &c.). It’s your responsibility as a performer to make sure your props are in good working order and in the correct location.

I’ve already written about kindergarten rules (aka respecting the property of others) which continue to apply. Take care of your own stuff and don’t mess with anyone else’s.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 12 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Dear Constant Reader,

I write to you from a haze of exhaustion. Hell Week for Vamps After Midnight started on Monday and we’ve been going non-stop. First performance is tonight! (Wait, Mina, I thought it opened yesterday? Be patient, Dear Reader…)

Here’s your tip:

When hit with a sudden curve ball, think fast and be ready to run with a new plan.

Wednesday night we had our dress/tech rehearsal and someone from the venue was there for an inspection. After we wrapped, we were told we couldn’t use our set. Due to a complete lack of communication from the venue, we did not know that some materials used to build the flats were unacceptable to them. Three days of work (and Devastasia’s beautiful painting)! had to be torn down right then.

We canceled the Thursday night preview. Overnight Scratch redesigned the set and bought new, acceptable materials the next day. Unfortunately, Plan B didn’t work (it required a level floor, which the theatre does not have), so we headed directly to Plan C (with much cursing along the way).

The cast, many of whom are not theatre people, have been great, pitching in where ever they can and staying out of the way when they can’t. I am deeply grateful to all of them.

Anyway, the set is not as beautiful or clever or funny as we planned, but at least we can have a performance tonight.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 12 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Dear Constant Reader,

This Friday is the calm before the storm that is Vamps After Midnite. On Monday Hell Week begins! Do you have your tickets?

This tip is for audience members, but obviously not you, my Dear Reader. You already know this.

Turn your phone off and enjoy the show.

I know we spent a lot of time without performances where audience and performer were in the same space.Just a little reminder that phones can be very distracting not just to you, but everyone around you. They make noise and light, neither of which is great during a show. Using your phone during a performance is disrespectful to the performers and to the audience.

I’ve seen people texting, posting, and even making phone calls during the show. Please step outside if communication is so urgent that it can’t wait until intermission or the end of the show. Because everyone has a camera in their pocket now, we’ve had audience members taking flash photos, taking selfies, and filming the performances. If you’re really compelled to take photos, please, please, please turn off your flash. It’s not just rude to inflict a sudden burst of light at everyone around you, it could be dangerous if the performers can’t see because of it.

Be present, without distraction, and enjoy the performance in real time.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 12 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Dear Constant Reader,

It’s Friday! I made a silly video yesterday, which has nothing to do with burlesque, but maybe it will make you smile. Here’s your tip!

One is funny. Three is funny. After that you have to go for 20.

Doing a comedy bit is funny on its own, but repetition can make it even funnier. However, three times is much funnier than two. But four times is not funnier than three. If you want to do it more than three times, you just have to keep doing it as many times as you can, which just gets funnier each time. My Commedia dell’Arte troupe called it “going for 20”.

The BeauTease are known for our dark Halloween cabaret, The Wrathskellar, but the last thing we wanted to do this year was a dark, intense, serious show. Hence, Vamps After Midnite, a burlesque show that goes worng. It’s a ridiculous comedy and we laugh a lot at rehearsals.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 12 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Dear Constant Reader,

It’s the first Friday of Fall! I hope you had a lovely equinox. Here’s your tip, courtesy of Scratch!

Help out your emcee — tell them the pronunciation of your name and your pronouns.

The host wants to give you a great introduction; give them the tools to get it right.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 12 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Dear Constant Reader,

It’s Friday! How about a tip?

Use hairnets to preserve your wigs’ styles.

After you go to all the effort to style your wig, put a hairnet over it to keep it looking good until you’re ready to wear it.

[You can find all my previous Tips on this page.]

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 12 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Dear Constant Reader,

I’m writing this in haste for The Expo begins today. Here’s your tip!

Buy from independent stores, artists, and craftspeople.

The big businesses will do just fine without your patronage, but these folks may not. The Expo has a fine selection of Vendors the weekend for your burlesque needs and desires. And there are many lovely small businesses here in Salem that deserve your support.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 12 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Dear Constant Reader,

It’s Friday again and this particular Friday Massachusetts is now requiring masks indoors again. You’ll need them when you attend The Great Burlesque Exposition next weekend! I though this tip was timely…

Wash your cloth masks after every wearing.

I like to handwash mine. Use cool or warm water (temperature doesn’t really matter) and some soap — this is the virus killer. I usually use Dawn because it also is great at removing lipstick stains. Take out any filters before submerging. Swish around and then thoroughly rinse until there’s no soap left. No need to soak. If your mask has wire shaping, definitely don’t let it hang out in the water longer than necessary. Let the masks air dry.

You can also machine wash, but if the masks have elastics, I recommend air drying. It’ll extend their life

If your masks are rhinestoned or have other embellishments, definitely hand wash! 

For a final touch, give them a quick press with the iron once they’re dry, to crisp up any pleats or folds. This is completely optional, of course.

Not only will washing with soap kill germs and viruses, you’ll have a fresh, clean piece of fabric touching your face, which is just more pleasant. And maybe save you from some irritation and break outs.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 12 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Dear Constant Reader,

Happy Friday! Here’s your tip!

Before every costume project, take your measurements, even if you’re sure of what they are, write them down, and refer to them throughout the project.

This tip brought to you by the woman fixing an almost-finished costume piece because she cut it a size too large.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 12 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.