Dear Constant Reader,
Happy Friday! Here’s your tip!
For any project, consider the Golden Triangle: good, fast, cheap. Pick any two.
Since you would never give a customer a truly bad product, I substitute “high-end” for “good”.
Friday Tip!
Dear Constant Reader,
Happy Friday!
I am pleased to report that my little book is at the printers! And we hit our 4th stretch goal with 20 hours to go (as of this writing)! I am so delighted at the positive response and I hope you will be equally delighted with the book.
And now for your tip!
Floorwork is not appropriate for every venue.
If the audience is in seating that’s not raked, your floor work will probably be invisible to all but the first rows as you disappear from view behind people’s heads. Also, the stage might be disgusting. Rock clubs are not known for the cleanliness of their floors. Have a contingency plan for these situations.
The simplest solution is to perform an act that has no floorwork. Problem solved!
Bring a set piece that will raise you up so you can be seen by all. This is the sort of thing the legends call a “prop”: a bench, chaise, platform, &c. I have a lovely prop Scratch built for me out of a coffee table.
For the above two solutions, you need to know in advance that the venue is unsuitable. To be prepared for an unpleasant surprise, create an alternate bit of choreography you can substitute for the floorwork. You can do the act even if you get to the venue and discover floorwork would be a bad idea.
Friday Tip!
Dear Constant Reader,
Happy Friday! I am so excited and grateful to announce that the campaign for my little book has hit its THIRD stretch goal. We’ll now have 4 pages in color!
If you want your name in the acknowledgements, this is the last day to pledge at that level.
And now for your tip…
New project, new needle.
When you start a new sewing project, put a fresh needle in your machine and change it often over the course of the project. Needles get dull and bent, especially when subjected to some of the fabrics we use for burlesque costumes. A dull needle can damage your fabric by punching holes instead of gliding between fibers, snarl your threads, and wreck your tension. New needles are so much cheaper than wasted time and bitter tears.
How often should you change your needle? I’ve seen recommendations for as little as 4 hours of sewing to as many as 20 hours. Personally, I listen. If I start to hear a popping noise when the needle goes through the fabric, it’s dull and must go.
I’m told by Scratch that this rule of thumb applies to carpentry as well. Not only do dull tools give poor results, they are actually dangerous to work with. A fresh table saw blade is much cheaper than a trip to the emergency room.
Happy sewing!
Friday Tip!
Dear Constant Reader,
Happy Friday! I’ve got some really exciting news before we get to your tip!
For more than four years, I’m been writing these tips here for you. Now I’ve collected some of my favorites (and winnowing them down was so painful!) into an attractive volume. That’s right, I’m publishing a book! Miss Mina Murray’s Little Book of Better Burlesque will be available in March! I’m so excited!
You can preorder your copy by backing me on Kickstarter. If the project is funded, I’ll be producing a lovely book. If it’s over-funded, I’ll be able to include even more tips!
And speaking of tips, here’s today’s:
Oil will remove lipstick.
If you run out of makeup remover, you can use an oil that you might have in your kitchen cabinet, like olive or coconut. However, oils in food will also take off and smear around your lipstick. So avoid eating greasy foods when you’re wearing lipstick! (You can chow down on the fried chicken or BLT in the privacy of your own home — that’s what I do.)
Friday Tip!
Dear Constant Reader,
Happy Friday! Happy New Year! I wish you all the best in 2016! To start your year off right, here’s your tip:
Take time to reflect on the lessons of the past year and your dreams for the coming one.
Thank you so much for continuing to read my missives for another year. I appreciate every Constant Reader.
Friday Tip!
Dear Constant Reader,
Happy Friday! Merry Christmas! Here’s your tip!
Christmas decorations can make great costuming embellishments.
They’re colorful, sparkly, and, right now (because I know most of you are reading this on Saturday), on sale. Go stock up!
Friday Tip!
Dear Constant Reader,
Happy Friday! I’ve been saving this particular tip for a special occasion and this is the right day for it. Here it is!
Don’t get cocky, kid.
Some of my Constant Readers will be amused more than others.
Friday Tip!
Dear Constant Reader,
Happy Friday! Here’s your tip!
When curling your lashes, move the curler from base to tip, gently squeezing as you go.
This gives you a more natural curl than one sharp crimp. You knew this already, but open the curler to move it; don’t drag it down your lashes while it’s closed. Ouch.
Friday Tip!
Dear Constant Reader,
Happy Friday! Here’s your tip!
Check your equipment yourself.
Aerialists already know this. If someone else sets up for you, don’t just trust that they did it correctly. Make sure. See for yourself.
Perhaps you have a set piece that breaks down for transit. You would want to make sure that at the venue it was assembled correctly and securely. This goes double for anything that supports you. Maybe it’s a prop that shoots confetti at a crucial moment. Check not only that it’s loaded, but also that it was loaded correctly.
Even costume pieces could use a doublecheck. I learned this to my regret a couple of years ago. In “Factory Girls”, we wear these adorable tear-away overalls (seen at right at the Ohio Burlesque Festival 2014). There’s a long row of snaps up each leg, so we always appreciate help resnapping after rehearsals and shows. However, and this is very important, to get the timing of the tear-off right, we only fasten every other snap. Also, since these were commercial overalls that we modified, they had a big rivet-like button at each hip, which we leave unfastened, using a whopper popper (a really big snap, for those who don’t know the lingo) instead.
A helpful stage kitten snapped up my overalls one day and I blithely put them on at our next show. It was only at the moment I went to pop the first whopper popper that I realized the button was also fastened. Oh crap. After fumbling frantically, I went for the tear and yes, you guessed it, every single blessed snap had been fastened.
It was my own damn fault. I didn’t check that the kitten knew the proper snapping procedure and I didn’t check that it had been done correctly. Don’t be like me.
Friday Tip
Dear Constant Reader,
Happy Friday! Here’s your tip!
Give thanks every day and not just on the fourth Thursday of November.
Oh, The Glamourous Life! 