Dear Constant Reader,
I was delighted to be accepted to perform at the New York Burlesque Festival this year, in The Teaser Party on Thursday night at The Bell House in Brooklyn. This is the same show I played 2 years ago, so I was familiar with the venue.
Thursday morning Scratch & I packed up Super Screen and the backlight and headed for NYC. Super Screen was supposed to ride of the roof, but due to one thing and another, it went into the Babydollmobile. Not ideal, as it just barely fits, but at least I didn’t have to worry about it up top.
Before going to the venue, we dropped in at Minnie Tonka’s place. Minnie had kindly opened her home to out of town performers for a little hospitality. It was a lovely gesture. She had found herself welcomed with open arms when traveling oversees and wanted to do similar. A little fresh fruit crisp, a little conversation, and it was time for my tech rehearsal.
I was pretty nervous about this act. It relies so much on other people (setting the screen, and the light, and then hitting the lighting cues). I shouldn’t have worried. I was in excellent hands with the tech crew. It even turned out that Scratch could do the lighting cues. I left the venue a lot more secure than went I arrived.
Because Scratch has excellent restaurant sense (it’s one of his superpowers), he found a barbecue place within walking distance of our parking space. I picked at a couple of lamb ribs, having returned to nervous, until we went back to the hotel for me to get ready.
With one thing and another, like the GPS having no idea how to deal with Brooklyn, we missed the first few acts and arrived near the climax of Legs Malone’s number. I honestly can’t do much of a recap of the other numbers as I was anxiously waiting for my time to go backstage.
But first, I participated in the Great Tassel Twirl Off. As many people as possible were going to get on the stage and twirl to “Bad Reputation”, led by who else — Jo Boobs.
(Filip Wolak Photography)
A few seconds in, my left tassel simply exploded. The pasties stayed on, but the tassel turned back into its component strands and fell to the stage. Still, I twirled away for the full 3 minutes with the sole remaining tassel. I know that doesn’t sound like very long, but trust me, it is. If you look very careful in the above photo, you can just see my leopard dress in the second row, between Cheeky Cheetah and Ruby Solitaire.
Before I knew it, it was time for my number. Everything went very well! The set up was fast. Super Screen worked perfectly. Scratch hit the lighting cues perfectly. And most importantly, the audience seemed to enjoy it.
(Filip Wolak Photography)
Besides being the debut of Super Screen, this was also the first appearance of what I was calling Baby’s First Merkin. For my non-burlesque readers, a merkin is a g-string without the string. I wanted to present a naked silhouette at the end of the act, without being actually naked (because one can’t be). The waistband of a thong tends to leave a little indent around the hips which is magnified in the shadow. So, I made & wore a merkin for the first time. It stayed on — I’ll call that a success!
After leaving the stage, I got a flying hug from international supermodel Sarah Hartshorne, who I was completely stunned to see. In fact it took me a moment to even realize it was her! That whole out-of-context plus dim lights plus post-performance daze. I was delighted she came out!
The rest of the show was kind of a pleasant blur as I enjoyed the acts on stage and the compliments from people off-stage, had a well-deserved drink and checked out the Scan-A-Rama.
And here’s the curtain call:
I bet you’re all dying to see my act and I won’t keep teasing you too badly. First I really need to thank a bunch of people:
Angie Pontani & Jen Gapay for inviting me to the party.
The Bishop of Burlesque & Scary Ben for making sure my set up went smoothly.
Steven Speliotis for the wonderful video.
And Scratch, for everything.
Last night Betty, Devora, Stella, Scratch, and I put in an appearance at the 1st anniversary party at 
Betty danced to “Midnight in Moscow” and “Night Train”. Devora took a turn with “Blue Prelude”. Stella serenaded us with “Ain’t Misbehavin'” and “Paper Moon”. I strutted to “Minnie the Moocher” and “Harlem Nocturne”. Scratch asked us to close out the night to “Little Brown Jug”. That’s the first half of Factory Girls — so Betty, D.D. and I did the choreography as best we could, sans gloves, overalls, and pink boxes. It was fun, but a little crazy trying to read each other’s minds as to how we should modify things on the fly.
The “Harlem Nocturne” act was a tad logistically complicated for me. Our dressing room was across the street in a secured building, but we found a safe place in the restaurant to stash my fans (and costume change) for most of the night — under a banquette by the musicians. It may be awkward to tote around a hard plastic box full of fans, but at least there’s peace of mind that they’re not going to be accidentally stepped on. The real challenge was fighting my way through the crowds (the joint was packed!) to get to the ladies’s room and back to change.
But no one had signed up for the first class, so Stella, Betty, and I did a little exploring while Scratch prepared either to teach or do some work (the latter as it turned out). We went to Red Bank and restrained ourselves at The Cheese Cave, amongst some other window shopping. We returned to see if I had any students for my boa class. And when the answer was no, Scratch took off with Mr. Khon, the event’s producer and we dancers rehearsed our number for the night. Betty did have students for her choreography class and the rest of us amused ourselves with milkshakes at Sonic (don’t judge; Sonic is very rare in the Boston area).
We set off in quest of Korean tacos that someone (Jess Distress?) had recommended, but ended up at a seafood place instead. Lobster chowder, softshell crabs, Jersey tomatoes, by the ocean on a cool and pleasant night. What could be more summery than that?
The next thing turned out to be dinner. We all wanted to eat at the place with the 
At the Ohio Burlesque Festival, one of the vendors, 
Before we hit the road there was a brief stop for more trash bags, some duct tape, and cold medicine, which both Scratch & Stella were needing at this point. 
Scratch was good enough (or delirious enough) to buy us each a roll of duct tape that fit our personalities. Can you match the duct tape to the burlesque dancer? (that’s bacon, mustaches, and leopard, just in case you can’t tell) When we were sure the pink boxes were good & sealed up, we headed off for Cleveland and the Ohio Burlesque Festival.
We were making good time and keeping an eye out for a gas station, when, like the day before, the skies grew black and suddenly opened up. The previous day’s rain was NOTHING compared to this storm. Thunder, lightening, torrential downpour, high winds. Cars were pulling off the highway — visibility was terribly. Then *hailstones*! And the hydroplaning. And just to make it super-fun, there was a non-zero chance of running out of gas in all this.
Finally, it was time for me to go on stage. I think the act went well. It was a very different style from everything that had been presented that night. I mean, I was using 16th century dance music (Celeste Giglio, if you’re curious). I honestly don’t remember the audience reaction during, but many people came up to me after to say how beautiful it was. And Brigitte & Stella said I nailed it. And they’ve seen it in *very* rough shape in rehearsal.
First things first, the annual picture of me looking like I’ve been run over while attaching the cargo carrier. We all met at the studio to load up and head off for our first destination: The Courtyard Theatre in Sellinsgrove, PA.
It was a little fussy loading up the car with all our crap. Although the plan was to have all 3 pink boxes (that’s one of them to the right) that we use in “Factory Girls” (and contain all our costumes) in the car, our Tetris failed and one had to ride on the cargo carrier. And my rice-paper silhouette screen got wrapped in a tarp and rode on the roof. (The reason I mention all these dull details will become clear later). The packing logistics plus some ugly traffic on 93 made for us being a bit behind schedule to start off.
Friday afternoon much of our time was taken up with load-in and tech requirements. I’m was told that the usual house lighting had been adjusted before we got there to add some of our usual requirements, like an MC spot stage left. It’s nice to have a long-standing relationship with a venue.
After the appearance we had a break for food before call, but it was too early for dinner for me. All I really wanted was a cold drink and some fresh fruit and Scratch knew just the place. We all converged on 
The show was a little more frantic for me as D.D. wasn’t in it. So, I went from being in 2 acts to 4, as I did “The Stripteaser’s Education” solo and took her place in the closing trio. Betty filled in for her in “Factory Girls” and Stella played the spider in Betty’s Zorita tribute.
The show went very well and afterwards we were besieged with photo requests. Not that I’m complaining! We’re happy to pose with our fans. Within reason. we did have to turn down the roller derby team’s request that we form a human pyramid with them.
Last week Mr. Scratch & I attended opening night of 
This was my back after Brigitte and I rehearsed our duet on Monday and my dress was off-center when she zipped me up. I didn’t even feel it at the time. Brigitte put some cover-up make up on it last night and hopefully the audience didn’t even notice. 
Oh, The Glamourous Life! 
