Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

It’s Friday again! Before I present your tip, a few announcements.

The Great Burlesque Expo was supposed to start today, but it’s been postponed until September. Tomorrow (Saturday the 18th) Expo staff, participants, and fans will be having an on-line get-together and you are welcome! Go to the Facebook event for more information.

I’m teaching a short burlesque lesson every Wednesday at 3pm on Instagram Live at @studyburlesque. If you miss it live, I’ll be posting the video to IGTV and YouTube.

And now for your tip!

Marking pens are a great addition to your costuming tools.

Just to be clear, these aren’t markers. They are special pens for marking fabric and the marks will disappear. They don’t brush away like chalk, so I use them on all but the darkest fabrics. Besides outlining your pattern pieces and making any sewing notations you need on the fabric, you can also use them to draw embroidery designs and mark locations of embellishments. The marks are just temporary — if you don’t like what you came up with, remove and try again!

There are two types of pens. Blue pens need to have their marks removed with water. I keep a little spritz bottle of water in my sewing room for just that purpose. Or just toss your garment n the wash. Purple pens are temporary — they’ll disappear on their own after about 25 hours. Less if it’s humid out. These marks can be helped along with water like their blue brethren. If marks don’t come out right away, just wet the again. you can also get fine point pens for delicate work.

A couple of caveats. Don’t iron directly on the marks — the ink can scorch and set, leaving a brown line on your fabric. I had a bad result rhinestoning on top of a purple marker line — the glue dried over the mark and it won’t wash out, protected by the glue.

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 17 April 2020 at 2:54 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Video Review: Booty Lab

Dear Constant Reader,

Here’s another instructional video from my collection.

Booty Lab by Michelle L’amour (2013).

The Queen of the Booty is undoubtedly Michelle L’amour, so who better to take you through all different ways to use your backside. And today is her birthday!

The video starts with a warm up, which is going to be needed if you follow along. The rest of the video is breakdowns of burlesque moves focused on the hips, thighs and bum.

She starts with bumps and shimmy variations that are standard burlesque fare, but they are clearly explained and demonstrated by Michelle. It’s no surprise that she includes isolations, one of her signature moves which you can see to great effect in her famous “Butthoven” video.

She moves down to the floor for some moves that quiver and shake your legs. These are then translated to standing moves, including the infamous ass clap. Take it from me, it’s much easier to do them on the floor…

Finally, she teaches the move everyone wanted to learn, the booty bounce. Later on there’s a bonus section of Michelle doing the bounce while in a handstand with her feet up on the wall.

After a review of all the moves, there’s a twenty-minute workout, focusing on the booty, of course, but with some abs and arm work as well. This is followed by a much needed stretch. I do this section (plus the warm up) when I need a hit of toning and don’t have much time.

Michelle is an excellent, polished teacher, and her explanations are easy to follow. She demonstrates the moves facing in different directions as necessary for a clear view. They’re also pretty clear for those who have no interest in learning these moves and just want to watch Michelle jiggle.

I’ve had this video since it came out and was fortunate enough to take Booty Lab with Michelle at BurlyCon before it existed. I go back from time to time to polish my moves. I always believe in going back to basics no matter how experienced you are. And maybe someday I’ll actually perfect the clap!

The DVD is no longer available, but you if you rent or buy Michelle’s extensive series of instructional videos, you also get Booty Lab.

Happy birthday, Michelle!

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 15 April 2020 at 8:15 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Film Review: The Night They Raided Minsky’s

Dear Constant Reader,

The other day one of my students asked for recommendations for movies about burlesque and I remembered this one…

The Night They Raided Minsky’s, directed by William Friedkin, MGM, 1968.

Based on the book of the same name, this movie, set in 1925, tells the tale of Rachel Schpitendavel (Britt Ekland), an Amish girl who dreams of dancing on stage in New York. She arrives at the National Winter Garden, a burlesque house, run by Billy Minsky (Elliot Gould).

Minsky is beleaguered by Vance Fowler (Denholm Elliott) a zealous anti-vice crusader who wants to raid the theater. Straightman Raymond Paine (Jason Robards) and top Banana Chick Williams (Norman Wisdom) realize they can solve this problem by informing Fowler that Mademoiselle Fifi will be performing her dance that drove a million Frenchmen wild at the midnight show. Of course, the performer will actually be modest Rachel, doing her Biblical interpretive dance. The raid will be a bust and Fowler humiliated.

Meanwhile Minsky is courting gangster Trim Houlihan (Forrest Tucker) in hopes that he’ll invest in the theatre, but Houlihan thinks that investment gives him exclusive rights to Mlle. Fifi… But not if Raymond Paine seduces her first… And Rachel’s father is storming into the city from Pennsylvania. His daughter had better on the last train home or he will disown her.

Suffice it to say, almost every man in this movie wants Rachel for something.

It’s not spoiling anything (since they announce it at the start of the movie) to say that Rachel gets on stage, discovers the power she has over an audience, and invents the striptease.

The movie betrays its 1960s creation with the saturation of the colors and Britt Ekland’s bouffant hair. However, it does slip in some actual footage from the 20s, and the Lower East Side is dressed up pretty accurately. There’s a nice bit where they transition from the vintage footage to black and white film of a street scene and then take it to color.

The best reason to watch this movie is the burlesque show. Throughout the movie you see the show in progress. A chorus line of 10 terrific girls (but only 9 costumes) prance and shimmy on the stage in skimpy costumes. One of them looks like she’d rather be anywhere else and another just can’t dance. There are classic comedy sketches like “Meet me Round the Corner” and “Crazy House”, some of them including talking women. The candy butcher does his spiel, pitching bonbons along with the promises of gold watches and racy pictures of Mlle. Fifi.

In 1968 there were plenty of people who still remembered burlesque and some of those people were in the movie. The Master of Ceremonies is played by burlesque tit singer Dexter Maitland. Bert Lahr, playing a retired straightman, got his start as a burlesque comic, before his fame as The Cowardly Lion. When he died before filming was complete, burlesque comic Joey Faye stood in for him. Morton Minsky, the youngest Minsky brother, was the technical advisor.

It’s a fun film with a great cast, but the highlights are the scenes onstage and backstage.

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 14 April 2020 at 2:44 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

It’s Friday again! Time for a tip!

All this constant hand washing is taking a toll on my skin and I’ve been going through a lot of moisturizers. How about an alternative to standard hand lotion?

Try solid lotion.

I love this stuff. It’s like a bar of soap, but it melts deliciously with body heat. Once we’re traveling again, since it’s solid, you can take it with you on a plane to combat the dry air. It’s great for massages too. The addition of glitter makes it perfect for pre-show sparkling!

You can certainly find solid lotion for sale, but it’s easy to make your own. You need some speciality ingredients, but the process is so simple. I’ve had great success with this formula.

Equal parts* of beeswax, coconut oil, and cocoa butter

Gently melt all ingredients together over very low heat. When the mixture is liquid, pour into molds. I use 2-ounce silicone soap molds, but you could try a muffin tin or an ice cube tray. Let the bars cool and harden. Pop them out of the mold and store individually in tins or other containers.

I think these smell wonderful as is, sort of honey-chocolate-coconut, but you can alway add a few drops of your favorite essential oil to the liquid mixture.

Also, if you’re adding glitter, be sure to use cosmetic grade!

Remember, these bars melt at body temperature, so when it starts getting hot out, stash them in your fridge.

*By weight, not volume. One ounce of each is a good start and will give you a couple of hotel soap-sized bars.

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 10 April 2020 at 12:06 pm  Leave a Comment  

In the Kitchen: Potato Kugel

Dear Constant Reader,

I promise I will get back to writing about burlesque. Someday. Soon, I hope.

Last night was the first night of Passover and Scratch and I made a little feast for ourselves. He made the matzo ball soup and charoset, and hunted down the elusive gefilte fish. I cooked a brisket, potato kugel, and roasted asparagus.

A friend, seeing my pictures on social media, asked for the kugel recipe, so I’ll share. (*whisper* It’s easy…)

For those unfamiliar, what is kugel? It’s translated as “pudding”, but before you have visions of a custardy sweet, think casserole. The most common kugels are potato and noodle, with the ingredients held together with egg and then baked and served as a side dish.

I’ve loved potato kugel since I was small. My grandmother had all our festive meals catered by Kartzman’s Deli and their’s was the first I had. I still haven’t managed to replicate it. I wasn’t as big a fan of the noodle kugel, which was the sweet kind, with raisins. (I much prefer savory noodle kugel.)

You don’t even really need a recipe and I generally kind of wing it, but I’ll give you the amounts I used last night.

Potato Kugel
2 large baking potatoes (about a pound and a half)
1 large onion
2 eggs, beaten
1/4 cup fat, divided (I used goose fat, since it was a holiday, but use oil, butter, whatever you like).

Peel and grate the potatoes. I use a food processor. I’ve never heard anyone say kugel potatoes must be grated by hand, unlike latke potatoes.

Salt the potato shreds and let them sit for a bit.

Chop the onion, maybe a shallot too if you’ve got it. Sauté the onion in half the fat until softened and a little golden, about 5 minutes.

Squeeze as much liquid out of the potatoes as possible. An easy way to do this is to put the grated potatoes in a dish towel and squeeze it. Or if you don’t feel like doing laundry, like me, just grab handfuls of potato and squeeze them over the sink.

Throw the wrung-out potatoes into a bowl. Mix in the onion and some ground black pepper.

Mix in the beaten eggs.

Heat the rest of the fat in a skillet and add the potato mixture, smoothing the top, but not packing it down. I used an 8″ pan and it was perfect for this amount.

Bake at 400F for about 50 minutes. The top should be brown and the edges crispy and sizzling. If it’s not brown enough, you could brush the top with some melted fat and pop it under the broiler for a couple of minutes.

I sprinkled it with snipped chives before serving. My parsley has barely broken the surface of my garden and I wanted some fresh spring herbs in this meal.

This made enough for 4 people. There are only two of us, so leftovers!

Enjoy!

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 9 April 2020 at 1:30 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

It’s Friday again! Today is a special guest tip!

My brilliant and creative friend Rae Bradbury-Enslin has come up with a super efficient method to sew Deaconess-style masks. You can find the original post on her FB, but here it is, step by simple step.

Instead of cutting all the masks to size, cut or tear your fabric at 12” lengths, fold over with right sides together, and sew the long seam (1/4” seam allowance) creating a tube. (If you’re using different fabrics for front and back, this works as well. Just cut the pieces a smidge larger and sew along both long edges.) Flip the fabric and press the seams flat. You should have a long tube about 6” wide.

Cut tube in 9” segments.

You will end up with several mask rectangles that are open on both ends.

Fold both ends inside about a half inch, press flat.

Iron in your pleats as demonstrated. [I can’t get the video to play on my site — go here for now]

Once your pleats are ironed, you should be ready to sew without needing pins.

Insert one end of a 7” piece of elastic at the top corner and sew down. Double stitch for strength.

Begin to sew the pleats down, inserting the other elastic end at the bottom corner as you go. Double stitch at the corner.

Start the next mask immediately, with no space. Repeat the process above with next mask

You can do as many masks in a chain as you’re comfortable with.


Flip your chain over and repeat process on other side. Note that you will be sewing against the pleats, so just make sure they’re feeding under the foot properly and they should be ok.


Chain of finished masks!! Just snip in between and they’re ready to go! 😊

Feel free to share this very efficient method, Dear Readers, but please give the credit to Rae Bradbury-Enslin.

M2

Published in: on 3 April 2020 at 1:31 pm  Leave a Comment  
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To Pass The Time…

Dear Constant Reader,

I know so many of us are feeling trapped and restless. Here are a few diversions I’ve found to help pass the time and stay active in body and mind.

The Enigma Emporium is offering their first set of postcard puzzles, Wish You Were Here, for free. Also, on their FB page, they post a puzzle every Friday — and there are years worth at this point.

The Morbid Curiosity Podcast has been sharing virtual tours on their FB page. And of course you could always give the podcast a listen.

Rory Raven is offering his walking tour of Salem on YouTube. Each short video provides a taste of Salem’s fascinating history.

Angie Pontani is teaching burlesque and go-go routines at 3pm Eastern every Friday on IG Live. If you miss it, she’s putting the videos up on her YouTube, but, trust me, they’re more fun live.

Her sister Tara aka Toning with Tara is running killer workout sessions via Zoom every weekday at 8:45am Eastern.

You can join me on Wednesdays at 3pm Eastern on IG Live at @studyburlesque for a short burlesque lesson. Also, I’ve been doing a little reading aloud.

What do you recommend to keep mind and body active?

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 1 April 2020 at 9:44 am  Leave a Comment  

What am I up to?

Dear Constant Reader,

How are you dong in this new, weird reality?

I’m pretty lucky because my day job (which I rarely talk about) can be done 99% from home. However, it does take up a lot of my time. Also, I’m spending a lot of time cleaning The Manor. I haven’t been nearly as creative or productive as I might have hoped. I haven’t even been snuggling Albert A. Cat as much as I (or he) would like.

I’ve been working on getting B.A.B.E. on-line. I didn’t want to just leave people who had already registered hanging until we could reopen the studio. Who knows when that will be? We are going to start offering our classes remotely via Zoom this Thursday. It’s totally uncharted waters for me and I hope it works!

I did a couple of mini-lessons on Instagram Live at @studyburlesque, one on floorwork and one with a boa combination. That was a lesson for me too. I’m so used to cuing off of students’ visual and verbal feedback that it was weird to just be playing to my phone. I knew people were watching right then, but I had no connection to them. It wasn’t even like recording a video, which I know will be watched later (and I can edit it).

Perhaps fortunately, that floorwork lesson is lost forever, as I didn’t know how to save the video (Instagram does not make it easy or obvious). Now I know, and I even know how to recover a video once it’s gone to stories, although that’s clunky.

I’m keeping these mini-lessons to 15-20 minutes — short and sweet. I’m also trying to figure out a consistent day and time to offer them. Let me know if there is anything you’d like to learn!

We had a troupe meeting on-line during on Sunday rehearsal time and it was so good to see everyone. Devastasia has the best backgrounds. Albert made a special guest appearance on my feed. We’ll be meeting again regularly and working on some projects, as best we can.

My partner, Mr. Scratch, unlike myself, is an essential worker. When he’s not producing burlesque shows, he’s a contractor. Right now, he’s renovating an old building that will be used for low-income housing. They’re in the final stages of painting and restoring some of the vintage details (his speciality) to make it beautiful. He says “just because it’s low-income housing, it doesn’t have to look like low-incoming housing”. He’s hiring as many out-of-work theatre people as he can. Right now he’s got a lighting designer, a rigger, and a playwright painting the place. They’re all being careful — since it’s an entire building, it’s easy to keep their distance, and they already had protective gear — but I do worry.

I hope you are well, dear readers. Let me know how and what you’re doing.

Next time I’ll share some resources to save off boredom and cabin fever.

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page.

Published in: on 31 March 2020 at 2:54 pm  Leave a Comment  

In the Kitchen: Krupnikas

Dear Constant Reader,

Elsewhere on social media someone was lamenting that she had a bottle of vodka that was too weak* to use for disinfecting and too cheap to drink. I suggested making a cordial. You don’t want to use good vodka** for that.

Cordials are alcohol infused with fruit, herbs, and/or spices, sweetened, and sometimes diluted. Some cordials need to sit for a long time, like cherry bounce, to get a good flavor. However, krupnikas, Lithuanian*** spiced honey vodka, can be made in a matter of minutes and served right away.

I flavor mine with cinnamon, clove, nutmeg, and lemon peel. You could also use fresh ginger slices, cardamom seeds, caraway seeds, vanilla (slice the bean lengthwise, scrape the seeds, and add the whole thing), orange peel, peppercorns, &c. Feel free to experiment!

Krupnicas
3/4 cup water
1 1/2 cup honey
4 cinnamon sticks
4 strips of lemon peel (just the peel, no white pith)
3 cloves
some fresh grated nutmeg
2 1/2 cups vodka

Put the water, spices, and peel in small saucepan and bring to a boil. Stir in the honey and return to a boil. Reduce the heat, cover, and simmer for 5 minutes. Remove from the heat and add the vodka. Serve hot immediately or let cool. Once it’s cool, remove the spices, and pour into a bottle through a coffee filter-lined funnel. Store in a dark place. It lasts about forever.

Į sveikatą! — To your health!

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

*Alcohol needs to be 70% for disinfecting purposes — that’s 140 proof!

**If you have decent vodka, use it in cocktails. If you have excellent vodka, stick it in the freezer and drink it in tiny icy-cold shots with at least two other friends accompanied by ever more extravagant toasts and some snacks like pickled herring on black bread.

***I am, at least in part, of Lithuanian descent. Bet you didn’t know that!

Published in: on 28 March 2020 at 6:23 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

In case you’re losing track of what day it is, it’s Friday. Time for a tip. I really wanted to give you a great everything-is-normal burlesque tip and I just couldn’t. Nothing is normal.

It’s okay not to be okay.

It’s okay to be scared. It’s okay to be sad. It’s okay to be disappointed. It’s okay to be stressed.

I know there are people broadcasting what productive and creative things they are doing while isolated, but if you consider it a major victory to have taken a shower, it’s okay.

These are uncertain times and you are allowed to feel how ever you feel. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Stay safe,

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 27 March 2020 at 5:06 pm  Leave a Comment  
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