Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

In case you’re losing track of what day it is, it’s Friday. Time for a tip. I really wanted to give you a great everything-is-normal burlesque tip and I just couldn’t. Nothing is normal.

It’s okay not to be okay.

It’s okay to be scared. It’s okay to be sad. It’s okay to be disappointed. It’s okay to be stressed.

I know there are people broadcasting what productive and creative things they are doing while isolated, but if you consider it a major victory to have taken a shower, it’s okay.

These are uncertain times and you are allowed to feel how ever you feel. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Stay safe,

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 27 March 2020 at 5:06 pm  Leave a Comment  
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In the Kitchen: Nana’s Meatloaf

Dear Constant Reader,

I figure we could all use a little comfort food right now. This meatloaf is one of my only true old family recipes, coming from my mother’s mother, known to her myriad beloved grandchildren as Nana.

My glamourous Nana modeling her beautifully coifed red hair.

This meatloaf has been loved by at least three generations. It’s easy and can be thrown together quickly from staples. Necessary for someone feeding a big family — besides herself and my grandfather, there were five children, her mother (the original Wilhelmina, from whom I take my name), and her brother. It’s remarkably unfussy in terms of ingredients and lends itself to variations. I’ve changed up the ingredients from time to time, but Nana’s original recipe is the one I come back when I need a little comfort.

You will need…

  • Ground meat. The original recipe calls for “chopmeat”, but you can use any kind of ground meat. I’ve made this with ground beef and ground turkey and meatloaf mix. I’ve never tried it with sausage meat, but that might work.
  • Minced onion. There’s no quantity in the recipe, but I usually use about half an onion. If you’re low on produce, use dried onion flakes.
  • Shortening. Use classic Crisco for authenticity. I usually use olive oil, but you could use butter or even bacon fat for extra deliciousness.
  • Catsup. I try to avoid sugar and artificial sweeteners in condiments, so I use a ketchup sweetened with honey (it’s really hard to find sugar-free ketchup). Although it smells obviously of honey when heated, I didn’t notice any difference in taste in the finished product. If you like something zippier, use chili sauce. You could also use barbecue sauce.
  • Breadcrumbs. I’ve made this with standard supermarket breadcrumbs, homemade breadcrumbs, and panko. If you don’t have breadcrumbs, toast a couple slices of bread and crush them in a ziptop bag with a rolling pin (or a wine bottle). Sometimes, when I use turkey, I’ve used stuffing mix instead of breadcrumbs. I’ve also used crushed corn chips — pairs nicely with the chili sauce above.
  • An egg. No explanation required.
  • Milk. It works just as well with non-dairy milk as with the real thing. 3 ounces is slightly more than a third of a cup.

To get started, heat the shortening or other fat in a small frying pan. Sauté the onions until softened. Add ketchup and remove from the heat. If you’re using dried onion, skip this step.

Put the meat in a large bowl and add the breadcrumbs. Add the ketchup mixture (or dried onions and ketchup), egg, and milk. Now’s the time to also add salt and pepper or any other seasonings you like. Now plunge your (very clean!) hands in and mix! There’s something very satisfying about squishing the mixture all together. The only time I remember my mother taking off her wedding ring was to make meatloaf.

When well combined, mold into a loaf and put into a small baking dish. My mother always made this in one of those Corningware baking dishes with the blue flowers on the side. I wish I had a set of those…

Bake for 1 hour at 350F until cooked through in the middle. Serve with mashed potatoes and a green veggie. When I was a kid, that was often peas, which we would mix into our mashed potatoes for Polka Dot Potatoes. It seemed like a special treat. These days, I prefer green beans with a hot vinegar-bacon dressing. To each their own.

There’s also a recipe for gravy, but I’ll be honest, I’ve never made it, because my mother never did. Perhaps one of these days I will, just to try it.

Here’s the original recipe, exactly as passed down to me!

Nana’s Meatloaf
1 hr – 350

1 lb chopmeat
3/4 C breadcrumbs
minced onion
2 T shortening
2 T catsup
1 egg
3 oz. milk

Sauté onion in shortening. Add catsup.

Add breadcrumbs to meat. Add catsup mixture, egg & milk.

Gravy — melt 3 T butter with 2 T flour. Add 1 t. gravy master, 1 C water & 1 T catsup

Enjoy!

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 24 March 2020 at 1:51 pm  Leave a Comment  
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So It’s Saturday…

Dear Constant Reader,

For many of us, today we’d be prepping for a show. Alas, That’s not going to happen. What to do instead?

Unpack your show bag. I’m looking at you…

Organize your makeup kit and toss old cosmetics.

Clean your makeup brushes

Clean your lashes.

Hand wash that pile of delicates.

Make those costume repairs you’ve been putting off

Read a book. Might I suggest one of these?

Go outside.

Cook something. Maybe a big pot of sometthing you can freeze part of for later. Or something elaborate you never had time for. Or just something you’re never made before. If you’re looking for recipes, might I suggest this collection.

Journal.

Rhinestone all the things.

Take a soothing bath.

Just breathe.

Take care of yourself. Please.

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 21 March 2020 at 5:43 pm  Leave a Comment  

Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

If you’re having trouble keeping track of the days while you’re at home, it’s now Friday and thus, time for a tip.

Clean your screens.

I know you’ve been hearing that you should disinfect your phone, but how?

If you’re lucky enough to have disinfecting wipes, you can use those. Otherwise use 70% isopropyl alcohol on a lint-free cloth. Take the phone out of the case and clean all sides of it.

Don’t use bleach. Don’t use ammonia. Don’t use hydrogen peroxide. Don’t use acetone. Don’t submerge it in liquid.

I got this info from Apple, but it probably applies to other types of phones.

Clean your phone, your tablet, your mouse, your keyboard, &c. — any electronics you touch.

Stay safe and healthy, okay?

I’m going to be presenting a short floorwork lesson on Sunday at 7pm (eastern time) on live on Instagram at @studyburlesque. I hope you’ll join me! You’ll just need a mat or towel to lie on.

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 20 March 2020 at 1:50 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Isolation Entertainment: Story Time

Dear Constant Reader,

I know so many of you are at home for the foreseeable future — me too. I hope to lighten the time with a little entertainment.

I recorded a video of me reading The Masque of the Red Death (in a vintage red satin peignoir) for my Patrons. Some of you might find that amusing; others wildly inappropriate. If you’re in the former category, here’s a little teaser…

You’ll have to join my Patreon to see the rest.

However, there’s an audio recording for everyone right here:
The Masque of the Red Death

You can also enjoy my reading of The Tell-Tale Heart from Halloween.

I’m looking for some more light-hearted (public domain) material for my next reading. Let me know if there’s anything you’d like to hear (or any other ways I can entertain and amuse you).

Stay well,

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 19 March 2020 at 11:44 am  Leave a Comment  
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Life in the Time of Coronavirus

Dear Constant Reader,

These are weird and frightening times. Most performers, burlesque and other, are out of work. Here in Boston all restaurants and bars are closed except for take out or delivery, but many are just closing for the duration, so all those people (some of whom are also performers) are out of work too. My heart goes out to all of those who have lost their income.

The Great Burlesque Expo has been postponed until September. The RVA Burlesque Festival (where I was going to perform) was postponed for a full year. And I just closed B.A.B.E. for the duration.

I’m going to see what I can do to provide entertainment and diversion for all of my Constant Readers. Give me your ideas for content you’d like to see in the comments below! At the very least, I’ll be writing here more often.

Stay safe and healthy, my dear Readers.

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 17 March 2020 at 1:23 pm  Leave a Comment  

Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

We are living in strange and uncertain times. My heart goes out to all those affected by the closures and cancellations. I know how you feel — The Great Burlesque Exposition has just rescheduled for September. It was a very hard decision and a lot of people are impacted, but it was the right thing to do.

Here’s your tip:

Support small businesses as best you can right now.

Producers and performers have had to cancel shows. Many small artists, shop owners, and other independent businesses are seeing reduced traffic and have had events canceled at which they were going to sell. A lot of income is being lost.

If you can, please help them out. You can send your favorite performer a tip or purchase something from your favorite vendor. If you don’t actually need anything right now, perhaps buy a gift certificate you can redeem later. I saw the great suggestion to buy gift cards from your favorite restaurant or cafe to use when it’s safe to go out again.

If you’re one of those economically impacted, leave a comment with your info, so my other Constant Readers can tip you or buy something!

Bonus tip, from the archives, but always relevant:
Be kind.

Everyone is just as anxious and uncertain as you are.

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! I’d like to welcome my newest Patron, Manuge et Toi!
To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 13 March 2020 at 1:41 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Museum of Burlesque

Dear Constant Reader,

I’m so excited to tell you that I am once again involved in a burlesque museum exhibit! As part of The Expo (and beyond), Scratch, Devastasia, and I (and surely some players to be named later, as this is a big job) are setting up a modest museum of burlesque history in Salem.

We’re mostly drawing on our large collection of posters, programs, photos, costumes, and other interesting stuff, but hope to have some loans (if you have something you think is important, drop me a line!).

Yesterday, Scratch and Devastasia went through a small portion of the collection, carefully inventorying each item, a task, which I admit is years overdue. It’s going to be so hard to decide what to include in the museum! I can pretty much guarantee that this beauty will be there:

Plus some of Lynne O’Neill’s costumes, including an actual hand-made garter!

Follow @burl.expo on Instagram to get a preview of some of the amazing items that will be on display, like this one

We hope to have a catalog, maybe on-line, for those of you who can’t make it to Salem in April and May, but that’s going to take time and work. More updates to come as we choose the items for display, design the exhibits, and start setting up the museum!

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

Published in: on 11 March 2020 at 3:25 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

Happy Friday! Here’s your tip!

Keep calm and wash your hands.

Here’s a few practical tips about preventing the spread of COVID-19, the coronavirus. Note: I’m not a medical professional, just someone who doesn’t want to get sick.

  • Don’t panic.
  • Wash your hands often. You should scrub your hands with soap for about 20 seconds, which is the time it takes to sing “happy birthday” or the alphabet song twice. Or if you are a more literary bent, you can recite the “Out, out damned spot” speech from Macbeth or the Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear from Dune. Personally I use the Gunslinger Litany from The Dark Tower. If you can’t wash your hands, use hand sanitizer. Also, stock up on hand lotion. All that hand washing is going to be rough on your skin.
  • Don’t touch your face. This is a really hard habit to break. Some things that can help is using the above-mentioned hand lotion. The scent can remind you as your hand is getting close to your face. You could pretend you’re in stage-face — you wouldn’t want to mess your makeup!
  • Clean your phone and other surfaces you touch regularly. My barre instructor has taken to disinfecting the barre while we’re doing our floor warm-up.
  • Cough and sneeze into a tissue or, if you lack one, your elbow (not your hand!)
  • Most importantly, if you’re not feeling well, stay home. People will understand, even your producer.
  • Did I mention, don’t panic? Use common sense to keep yourself and others healthy.

    For some in-depth and research-based advice, please check out this on-going series from Siderea. And there’s always good information on the CDC and WHO websites.

    Stay healthy!

    M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

    Published in: on 6 March 2020 at 2:59 pm  Leave a Comment  
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    Friday Tip

    Dear Constant Reader,

    Happy Friday!

    I’ve been posting weekly tips here for over 8 years! I want to start creating video tips as well, but, as I realized when I tried to film one this week, I am sadly in need of better equipment! I had a holder for my phone and I had a tripod, but it turns out they’re not compatible! Fortunately, I am an experienced MacGyver (I was once even nominated for a Golden Pastie in that category) and with some painter’s tape and other things I found around the house, managed to mate them long enough to film, but it was really awkward.

    If you would like to see video Tips and tutorials, consider becoming a Patron! With more Patrons, I can splurge on some better equipment and maybe even have someone else involved, which will make for *much* a better quality product. The videos are going to be Patron only!

    And now for your tip…

    Sequined fabrics require special treatment when sewing.

    First off, the sequins will dull your scissors, so don’t use your best fabric shears to cut out your garment.

    They’ll dull your needles too, so remove all the sequins from your stitching lines. Sequins add bulk, so also remove them from the seam and hem allowances. And they’re scratchy. You’ll be just as happy not having them on the inside of your garment.

    Removing sequins is a little tedious, since you don’t want to snip the threads holding the sequins in place — you’ll lose all the other sequins on that thread. Instead, snip the sequin itself (again, not with the good scissors!). Put down a dropcloth before you start because this will get messy! You’ll also need to do the same thing if you’re working with beaded fabric, but you can just smash the beads (lightly!) with a hammer. Wear eye protection!

    When sewing the fabric, wear the above-mentioned eye protection as well, just in case you strike a sequin by mistake and your needle breaks.

    When pressing sequined fabric, always use a press cloth to protect the sequins from the heat of your iron. They’re only plastic and can melt or discolor.

    Save your fabric scraps, so if you lose some sequins on your finished garment, you can harvest some from a scrap and sew them on the bald spot.

    Go forth — sew your sequins and sparkle smartly!

    M2Like this costuming tip? There are lots more in Miss Mina Murray’s Little Book of Burlesque Costuming.

    These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page. Or you can just tip me if you liked this.

    Published in: on 28 February 2020 at 2:54 pm  Leave a Comment  
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