Mini BurlExpo

Dear Constant Reader,

I’m so sorry for the recent silence. I have a lot of catching up to do! It’s been crazy busy for me recently and this was part of it.

Mini Expo PostcardThe last Saturday in July was the first ever Mini BurlExpo. The what? Every year Scratch hosts The Great Burlesque Exposition, a massive three-day burlesque event, which for various reasons beyond his control, has been held in February for the past several years. And invariably there has been a snowstorm that very weekend, causing chaos and disruption. He thought it would be fun to have a small, low-key version of the Expo in the summer.

Friday night there was a performer cookout, sponsored by Viva Vermont Burlesque, held in the backyard at The Manor. We cooked hot dogs and s’mores over the fire, drank local beer, and generally had a lovely time.

Next morning it was off to The Thalia for a day of classes. The regular Expo has 4 tracks of classes over 3 days, so a mere 5 classes (plus one on Sunday) was a bit more manageable. The offerings included marketing, ballet for burlesque, chair & floor work, and twerking.

In the evening there were two shows, as compared to The Expo’s four over three days. The first, The Mini Event, was a take off on The Main Event, the Expo’s competition. Instead of competing for serious titles like “Most Classic”, the performers were in the running for audience-voted awards like “Damn! That Was Awesome!” and ridiculously random trophies.

The show opened with an adorable group number from The Expositionettes, created by Betty Blaize and featuring her, Artemisia Vulgaris, Brigitte Bisoux, Devastacia, and Kitty Levesque. I’d like to point out that Brigitte was filling in for a performer struck ill and she only had one rehearsal. She’s just that good.

We had a whole host of performers, from all over the country, showing off the beautiful and the bizarre. There were veterans and neophytes and a whole range of performances styles, all creative and entertaining.

While the very official ballot-counters were tabulating the results (that would have been me and Betty), the audience was entertained by Diamond DeVille (Most Beautiful 2017), and Egypt Blaque Knyle (Best Solo 2016 and a huge number of other awards). I’m glad we counted efficiently and I was able to see most of Egypt’s remarkable performance.

The well-deserving winners were Bea Trouble who received “Greatest Googly-Moogly” for her cow-themed striptease (it was fabulously absurd and I’m not giving away the punchline), Mr. and Mrs. Fucksmart who were awarded “Most Pantsfeelings” for their sexy duet to “Tainted Love”, and Tapitha Kix was honored with “Damn! That Was Awesome” for her tap pointe striptease (yes, seriously, she can tap dance en pointe). Everyone put on a great show!

Then it was time for the second show, Late Night Lust, a passel of more risque acts. I was delighted to have the opportunity to perform my bathtub act with the lovely Artemisia Vulgaris as my lady’s maid. I really love this act, but it’s difficult to find a venue for it — it’s long (almost 8 minutes), it has a fussy set up, it requires a second performer to be my maid (it’s too complex a job to just ask a stage kitten to help) and requires a stage on to which the tub can be rolled (it’s really heavy once it’s filled with water, so carrying it up steps is right out). I feel so Lili St. Cyr-ish when I get to bathe. Maybe this time I’ll finally get some decent video — it’s been like a curse.

The next morning those that were up to it returned to the theatre for a little brunch and another class from Egypt (fantastic, by the way) and our little Expo interlude was over. It was a fun event for the middle of the summer. Who knows? It may become tradition! And now it’s time to start gearing up for The Great Burlesque Expo in January. Hope for no snow storms!

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page.

Published in: on 23 August 2017 at 3:25 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

Happy Friday! I’m at the ABurlyQ! Burlesque & Sideshow Spectaculár, but I would not forget your tip. I can’t believe I never shared this one before, but apparently not…

Attach a tassel or other decorative item to your zipper pull to make it easier to grab.

At the right you can see Devora Darling illustrating this tip (see it up close and personal at Cover Girls tonight in Salem and tomorrow in Dover, NH). Of course, it doesn’t have to be a tassel; you could use ribbon, trim, bits of jewelry. You’re just trying to make it easy to find by touch.

The other advantage to this is that you are extending the zipper pull, like those extra-long pull-cords on overhead lights for us short people. You won’t have to reach up awkwardly high to pull down the zipper — a boon for dresses with a high back.

M2Like this tip? There are lots more in Miss Mina Murray’s Little Book of Better Burlesque.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page.

Published in: on 18 August 2017 at 11:00 am  Leave a Comment  
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Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

Happy Friday! Here’s your tip!

champagne on iceWhen removing garments, position the removal downstage.

You want the audience to see you remove the garment, so you should avoid blocking the action with your body. On the other hand, if you’re trying to remove something more covertly, turn it upstage.

I am clearly lacking in performance photographs* because this photo by RDJ After Dark is the only picture I could find even close to illustrating this tip, and you can’t see the stocking I am removing from my downstage leg because black on black…

M2Like this tip? There are lots more in Miss Mina Murray’s Little Book of Better Burlesque.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 7 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page.

*If you happen to have any performance photos of me or my troupemates, let me know!

Published in: on 11 August 2017 at 11:45 am  Leave a Comment  
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Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

Happy Friday! I’m at the Pennsylvania Burlesque Festival this weekend, but I wouldn’t forget your tip!

Wear a watch when you teach.

A good class is well paced. Keeping an eye on the time ensures that you don’t have to rush through or run out of material. Of course, you can never guarantee that an unfamiliar classroom or studio is going to have a clock. But wait, you say, my phone has a clock. Yes, but you have to periodically run over and poke it to see the time display, which can break the flow of class. A wrist watch allows for a subtle time check. And it can be a charming fashion accessory as well as a useful tool.

M2Like this tip? There are lots more in Miss Mina Murray’s Little Book of Better Burlesque.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page.

Published in: on 4 August 2017 at 11:16 am  Leave a Comment  
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Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

Happy Friday! Tomorrow is the Mini BurlExpo! Will I see you there? Here’s your tip!

To remove deodorant streaks from clothing, gently rub them with a nylon stocking.

Every once in a while it happens, you look smashing except for those white streaks that have mysteriously appeared on your lovely frock. I don’t know about you, but for me they always seem to end up right on my bust. Oops…

Just grab a stocking and gently rub the mark away. No need to use water! Dryer sheets also work, but how often do you have one of those in your boudoir (or backstage). As when dealing with any stain, don’t scrub — rub gently, with a circular motion, until the mark is gone.

M2Like this tip? There are lots more in Miss Mina Murray’s Little Book of Better Burlesque.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page.

Published in: on 28 July 2017 at 10:21 am  Leave a Comment  
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Show on the Road 7/23/17

Dear Constant Reader,

It’s been a while since we went on a substantial road trip. We were hired to entertain at a Vegas-themed 18th birthday/graduation party in Greenville Junction, Maine, which is about 5 hours from Boston. The birthday girl originally wanted a trip to Las Vegas, but instead she got a party with gambling and showgirls.

Scratch, Betty, Artemisia, and I piled into the BeauTeaseMobile for the long drive. We broke the trip in Portland for a little fun. First stop, The Holy Donut. Their famous cheese and bacon-filled donut was as amazing as promised. The chocolate sea salt was also outstanding. Highly recommended, if you like donuts.

Then on to the Cryptozoology Museum to gaze upon the weird and the mysterious. It’s a fun collection of really eclectic stuff, like a Feejee mermaid, big foot track casts, and Wessie’s shed skin. The curator in me desperately wants to rearrange things and write wall text.

As luck would have it, the museum shares a building with Big J’s Chicken Shack, so that was the obvious choice for lunch. I’d been craving fried chicken recently (the problem with reading a murder mystery series set in the south), so I was not displeased with this turn of events.

I was, however, extremely displeased to drop my iPhone in the parking lot, shattering the screen into a thousand tiny fragments. This is why I was largely absent from Instagram for this trip and the pictures I did take are of dubious quality.

We all piled back in the car for the long drive up to our final destination. Once you’re off the highway (and we were on local roads for quite a while), it’s really beautiful. We passed through a bunch of charming towns, like Sangervile (Town of Two Knights) and Abbott (Maine’s #1 Town). Closing in on our destination, we weren’t sure we were ever going to make it, as the GPS kept taking us down deserted roads that dead ended at scary-looking industrial buildings. Probably not a wise idea to have the GPS voice set to “Dr. Nightmare”.

But we did finally make it to the venue, Woody’s Bar & Grill, without incident. The whole place was done up with Vegas-themed decorations and various table games. There was a small stage and a large dance floor, which is where we did most of our show — Betty and her giant dice were up on the stage. Appropriate to the gambling theme, but just part of the everyday decor, there are dollar bills stuck all over the ceiling, some very high up. Apparently there’s a way to toss them up there with a quarter and a tack and it seems to be a popular past time. The staff was terrific and very accommodating. I made a short video backstage before the show, which is available to my Patrons.

Keeping with the Vegas theme, both Betty and I had new showgirl headdresses for a couple numbers, as created by Scratch (yes, he’s multi-talented). This was Artemisia’s first show with us and not only did she sing, she also performed her first striptease! We were joined by local(ish) flow performer Lexi Go-go, who dazzled us with her hooping. Her first act was done with changeable LED hoops and the second with SIX hoops. There was also magic from Scratch as well as striptease from Betty and me. The audience was appreciative, but mostly importantly, the birthday girl was very happy with the show.

Afterwards, after dragging Scratch out of game of Texas Hold ‘Em that he was trying unsuccessfully to lose, we retired to the luxurious accommodations provided for us. I’m not being facetious — it was a huge suite at a lakeside lodging. We each had our own room — usually on these road trips, we get very cozy and friendly in a single hotel room. There was even a jacuzzi tub in the (enormous) bathroom and a stack of washcloths with a little note “for makeup removal”.

This was the view the next morning:

That’s Moosehead Lake. Pretty gorgeous, no?

It was a long, long drive back to Boston. Mostly uneventful, except for the pouring rain for most it and the GPS taking us down a series of progressively less road-like roads. Finally faced with a gravel track heading into the woods, we decided not to trust a GPS in Stephen King country and backtracked to civilization. We broke the trip in Portland for a fabulous brunch and continued on it the rain back to Boston.

This weekend is the Mini Expo and then we are back on the road!

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 7 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page.

Published in: on 26 July 2017 at 3:40 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

Happy Friday! This is my 300th tip!

Plan to decorate your costumes in stages.

We often don’t have the time or the money to realize our costume dream all at once. If you plan out how you are going to decorate in phases, you end up with a coherent design that looks good at any time. Create an over-all plan, which you can break down into stages.

For example, you’ll start with a spattering of rhinestones on the cups of a bra, but you’ll place them so you can add additional stones in other colors and sizes later. Next time, you’ll add some fringe, which is easy because you made sure to keep the fringe area clear of rhinestones in your first phase. Then, some more rhinestones, which integrate into the ultimate rhinestone pattern. Later, some swags of beads. More rhinestones. &c ad infinitum.

The bra to the right, isn’t the best example of this, but it’s the one I had to hand. And I know how much you love pictures. I think it took 3 decorating sessions, with performing in between, to get to this point. Betty is really terrific at this form of incremental decorating.

M2Like this tip? There are lots more in Miss Mina Murray’s Little Book of Better Burlesque.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 7 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page.

Published in: on 21 July 2017 at 2:41 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Upcoming Events

Dear Constant Reader,

Last night one of my students asked if I had any upcoming shows and should she check my blog for the schedule. I keep a schedule on my website, but it’s certainly not a bad thing to also post it here. This is going to be a long one…

This Sunday, July 23, I’m heading to Maine with Betty, Scratch, and one of our new interns, Artemisia Vulgaris, for a private show. It’s a Vegas-themed birthday party and I’m looking forward to wearing my new showgirl headdress.

The following Saturday, July 29th, I’m teaching and performing at the Mini Expo. You can catch me and my bathtub at the Late Night Lust show at 10:30.

The very next weekend, I’m heading to Jim Thorpe, PA for the Pennsylvania Burlesque Festival. I’ll be performing at the Friday Night Delight, then teaching two workshops on Saturday as part of the Burlesque Boot Camp. If that weren’t enough, I’ll be performing again Saturday night in The Big Reveal competition, as a soloist and as part of The Boston BeauTease. Wish me luck!

Next up: I get a blessed weekend off.

Then I hop on a plane to New Mexico for ABurlyQ! Burlesque and Sideshow Spectacular, August 17-19. I’ll be teaching Friday morning and then performing Friday night in The Wild Ones showcase. I’m there for the whole weekend (although I’m sad to miss the Sunday field trip because Southwest doesn’t offer flights after 5pm. What?).

While I’m off in the Land of Enchantment, The Boston BeauTease will be bringing you Cover Girls, an evening of familiar music with a twist. On Friday night they’re at the Deacon Giles Speakeasy Lab in Salem, MA and on Saturday at the Strand Ballroom in Dover, NH.

I’ll join the cast of Cover Girls on August 25-26 at The Thalia.

Seeing it written out like this is exhausting, but it’s going to be so much fun!

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 7 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page.

Published in: on 20 July 2017 at 10:47 am  Leave a Comment  
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In the Kitchen: Spiced Cherry Soup (1958)

Dear Constant Reader,

For a couple of weeks in late June and early July, it’s sour cherry season at The Manor. We are constantly picking, pitting, and cooking cherries from the orchards (all right, it’s just one tree). I’m always on the lookout for new and interesting cherry recipes to add to our arsenal of favorites.

Recently Scratch gave me a clutch of vintage recipe pamphlets which included Good Housekeeping’s Around the World Cookbook: specialty recipes with a foreign flavor. I was surprised at the variety of countries represented and the sophistication of the recipes, especially compared to some other cookbooks of the era and their idea of “international” cuisine.

Hungary was one of the countries well represented with many recipes. Since Scratch was recently in Budapest, Spiced Cherry Soup (Hideg Cseresnyeleves in Hungarian) sounded perfect. It specifically calls for sweet cherries, but of course I used our sour ones.

Pit and stem cherries. Remove strips of zest (no white pith) from half a lemon. Stick whole cloves into the peel. Put the cherries and lemon peel into a sauce pan along with a cinnamon stick, some sugar, salt, and water. Simmer. Stir in tapioca and bring to a boil. Add red wine then remove from the heat and allow to cool. Remove lemon peel, cloves, and cinnamon then chill.

Serve cold garnished with a thin lemon slice and a dollop of sour cream.

It make a deliciously tart and refreshing soup, great as a starter or as dessert. The tapioca thickens it, but doesn’t make it utterly gloppy, which I had feared. I think the lemon garnish is optional, but the sour cream (in the original recipe as “commercial sour cream”) is mandatory.

I made only one change (besides using sour instead of sweet cherries). In the original recipe, you add the wine after taking the soup off the heat. I find the raw alcohol taste unpleasant and prefer to let it simmer for another moment or two to cook out some of that harshness.

Here’s the recipe, slightly modified:

1 lb. cherries (washed, pitted, and stemmed)
1 lemon
6 whole cloves
3” piece of cinnamon stick
1/3 cup granulated sugar
1/2 tsp. salt
3 cups water
3 Tbs. quick-cooking tapioca
1 cup red wine

With vegetable peeler, remove peel from lemon in strips; stick cloves into peel.

In saucepan, combine cherries, lemon rind with cloves, cinnamon, sugar, salt, water. Simmer, uncovered, 15 for minutes.

Gradually stir in tapioca; bring to boil; then stir in wine; remove from heat; allow to cool. Remove and discard lemon peel, cloves, and cinnamon; then refrigerate until serving time.

To serve, ladle ice-cold soup into individual soup bowls or plates; top each serving with a lemon slice and spoonful of sour cream.

Makes 4-6 servings

M2These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 7 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page.

Published in: on 18 July 2017 at 2:47 pm  Comments (1)  
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Friday Tip

Dear Constant Reader,

Happy Friday! Here’s your tip!

Meet your deadlines.

Even better, beat your deadlines!

Nobody likes having deadlines hanging over their head! Unfortunately, sometimes the reaction is to panic and ignore them, which is the worst thing one could do.

Deadlines are a cascading thing. You need to send your music to the producer. The producer needs to get the music to the audio person. The audio tech needs to check the music file and get everything properly set up for the show. One break in the chain causes failures down the line. Scrambling at the last minute is no fun for anyone.

Do what you need to do to make sure those deadlines aren’t forgotten. Maybe that’s a reminder on your phone (there’s plenty of apps out there to help with scheduling). Maybe it’s a big note on the calendar hanging over your desk. You know how fond I am of appointment books.

Whatever method you use, meet those deadlines. It feels so good to mark that item as “done”!

M2Like this tip? There are lots more in Miss Mina Murray’s Little Book of Better Burlesque.

These writings and other creative projects are supported by my 7 Patrons. Thank you so much! To become a Patron, go to my Patreon page.

Published in: on 14 July 2017 at 1:41 pm  Leave a Comment  
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